Sunday, November 2, 2008

Rocket science..

Everyone loves to fly..Everyone loves the way of rockets fly..Its an event in itself..Though,,i'm not gonna write abt chandrayan-1 or something like that..People are going all ga-ga over the mission and are raving about the rocket science used in it and all.. But I am not rocket scientist in the true meaning,,so i'd rather talk about the other, more contemporary type of rocket science most Indians know abt!

Yes, i'm talking abt the 'rockets'(firecrackers) that pretty much every Indian is aware of..You'll get them in flashy boxes usually with a pic of some actress/sportsman with some fancy/deadly name and sky filled with explosions or colors above their heads...Make no mistake,,the pictures are in no way related what the rocket actually is..I dont even know how many types they are called now,,but i like to keep it simple and i classify them as - rocket bomb, the light-walla rocket, the siren rocket and the (lesser known,but super cool) parachute bomb!

Snippet from history-->
Rockets were not always used for diwali..They used to be used in India during street-fights/gang fights!! The rockets used to be made in a way so as to fly horizontally above the ground and go and explode at a certain distance!!
Source:- My grandfather!! He's seen these fights first hand and His elder brother apparently was an expert at making these rockets!!

Despite how wild this claim may sound,,there is a funda behind the motion of these rockets..This info comes straight from my grandfather, after the above stated point, there's no way u can dispute it!
Funda-> Place the rocket horizontally on your finger, in such a way that the head (the explosive part) lies on one side and the stick on the other side of the finger. Sort of like a scale. If it balances, then the rocket is supposed to go straight ! simple!

But coming to the actual fun of diwali rockets..They tend to be very temperamental..You never really know what they'll do..Usually, a whole box of rockets behaves in a similar way..Its more fun to talk of rockets based on the way they fly (or not)..I suppose i could divide them into a few types,,like->
1. The zoomers-> Go straight up, very fast and do whatever they are supposed to (siren,light,bomb etc..).Safe, not very interesting or eventful,,unless fired in a direction other than up!
2.The fizzers-> They dont rise, they'll just fizz out all of their stuff in the bottle,,not moving an inch..Its more like opening a cold drink bottle than firing a rocket..
3.The Turners-> they come out at hyper speed, and with the same speed turn towards some side and zoom away until they hit something (or someone)..Run and hide when u get a batch of these..Will scare the living daylights out of unsuspecting junta around..
4.The twisters->They'll go up a little,,and start going round and round in really tiny circles..And most of them keep ascending while doing this!! They are the most puzzling of the lot,,and also the most fun to watch!!
5.The U-turns-> They use power to go up, they use power to come down..And they land less than 20 feet away still spewing out sparks..All in a nice little shape of an upside-down U..
6.The thinkers-> These are the most interesting of the lot,,they'll slowly rise a couple of feet high,,maybe even float in air for a couple more seconds,,and at once choose one of the above behaviours, gain a high speed and zoom away!!
7. The fat-asses-> Nothing can get these guys to move out of the bottle..No amount of fire will propel them upwards, their asses will be firmly planted in the bottle..An even worse case of this is when they dont even send out any fire,,they just explode knowing that its no use trying!!
8.Tussssssssss->This is one category that applies to almost every cracker..They're stubborn and wont fire up even if u light them..They'll just eat up the wick and sit there doing nothing..They are the most dissapointing..

The maddest rockets ever!!
place-> hyderabad - Duttasai apts
Karthik's and his brother left some crackers over from the earlier diwali..This contained a few boxes of rockets too..As they are the most fun to watch, with great anticipation the rockets were brought forth..Now, noone reailsed that they had gone soggy in the time and noone dried them in the sun..The rockets,,as they seemed weren't too happy abt it..They were at their moody best..Every rocket was more innovative than the last..They each tried to outdo the madness spread by the earlier rocket..After every rocket,,ppl used to run and hide,,cos noone was safe from the ire of the rockets.Some went along the ground, some into the postbox, some into karthik's house (which was right above),some just went tuss or died, the best and most faithful ones performed a hyper-speed U turn and landed in the 'kanjoos marwadi's' house(The house beside our apartments where they never used to return the ball if it fell in..They must've been the most hated characters in the colony, thus the name..), much to the pleasure of everyone there, who even applauded the rockets for expressing our dissent..Eventually,,every rocket became an adventure with the anticipation reaching phenomenal levels and the reflexes of every person their being tested as they performed daredevil acts escaping the rogue rockets!! Never was, or never will be a box rockets as much mad and as fun as that !!

Come to think of it, is it even right to call it rocket 'science'..Cos even after so many launches and billions of dollars and years of calculation, if even NASA can't properly launch rockets,,Then maybe it is more of a probability function or a game of luck than an actual science..

Karthik-> One of my oldest friends..Was the first person i met in my apartments..When i was in school,,I think i spent more time in his house than mine!!The only person who ALL of my friends in hyd know regardless of how i know them.. He loves the phrase "lite le " and shows the same attitude in pretty much everthing he does! Though I wont go into the nicknames here for his sake...


  1. i dont even remember that !!! We blew up a lotta shit ... garbaaaaze and antiques alike >> we blew the shit outta everything

  2. dude that "kanjoos marwadi" guy got shot in front of his house a few days back .... not kidding ... He got shot in the mouth.